Beth emphasising that most stage managers in the industry are women (65.9% hired from 2013-15 were women), but that the stage manager role in most productions of Our Town would usually go to a man, felt like a strong feminist statement that gave me a newfound appreciation for the role and a sense of responsibility to do it justice. To learn what being a stage manager is like, I spoke to the ASM of Mouse Trap to ask questions (see figure 1 for an example of a voice note I received). I learnt a lot that I could apply to my performance; for example how much she genuinely cares for the individual cast members, the relationship between the other stage managers and the pride for the job.

For the New Hampshire accent, I had to do a lot of research into the specificity of its sounds. I created a YouTube playlist of videos (figure 2) I could reference and made sure to practice the sounds every day. 

I was extremely nervous about the accent work as Dyspraxia affects my ability to initiate, plan, co-ordinate and produce sequences of speech sounds. As a result, I have always struggled to get specific sounds right. Having advice from our accent coach Jess was hugely helpful as she could point out specific sounds I hadn’t realised I was struggling with. Knowing what to focus on felt more manageable so this slightly alleviated my nerves. 

Throughout the process, I came to accept that it’s okay that I just have to work harder to get the accent right. I learnt that repetition was key, and that it was important to trust I would get there eventually in order to focus on the performance I was giving.

Whenever I begin working with a script, my process is heavily influenced by ‘Stanislavski’s System’. For example, I always begin with writing out my given circumstances; the essential facts about my character. Thus helping me build an immediate picture of who they are. However, this was more challenging than usual as there wasn’t much detail in the script about my characters. So, I made sure to use my own imagination to create a lot of detailed information for myself to flesh them out fully. Then I was able to create a super objective (the character’s overall desire that drives their action through the play) and after, create a vocabulary of transitive verbs (figure 3b) which I used as my actions during scenes.

Even though I now felt I had a good understanding of my characters, specifically the stage manager still felt very under-developed to me. I didn’t feel excited by them, and I felt disheartened and anxious about my ability to play them truthfully. I knew that I wanted to separate the characters physically, so I decided to test out applying animal studies to the stage manager. Even though this had never been an ‘in’ for me before, I thought that, since my interpretation of the stage manager was that they are more ‘God-like’ than human, I should apply a more abstract technique.
I decided to research lions and began to layer in characteristics, see figure 4. This ended up being hugely helpful. I was then able to come into rehearsals more excited, having done the research preparation, ready to play around with this new found physicality. This immediately helped separate the characters from myself and each other as it gave intention and a distinct physical vocabulary. For example, in one moment in the show I used the lion’s impulses and chose to stalk – since ‘the animal gives you a funnel for your impulses’ (Glenn English) I could make a choice I would never have made without this approach. It really worked for the scene and, with the lion’s physicality, it made the action feel embodied.

Throughout the whole process we also all got involved with improvisations in character. I found a particular exercise helpful where we chose a song that we felt represented our character and walked around the room being given prompts of what to think about in character by our director, Beth. This created a spontaneous inner monologue. I hadn’t considered how music would help me connect to a character; it simply provided the vibe and atmosphere that helped me feel the energy and headspace that I need to be in. When I realised this, I created a character playlist for each of my characters which I used when warming up for every rehearsal in order to get into the headspace. 

One exercise that really helped make the world of the play more alive was splitting off into ‘character groups’ and creating a joint memory between us. As the stage managers, we created a memory about dealing with a crisis late into the rehearsal period. We then performed this memory, making the memory more ‘real’. I then found this added a humorous undertone when I see Anna become the character Joe, which helped me feel more connected to my character through having ‘experienced’ a memory I could recall. This also developed the connection between stage managers. Which, was asked of us from Beth. Before, we didn’t interact often but after, we were able to build a fleshed out relationship between us through an understanding of the camaraderie.

In early rehearsals I was not placing enough importance on the blocking of each scene. As the assistant stage manager, one of my roles was to make sure the chairs were set up for every scene. Initially, I was confident that learning the queues and placements would come naturally so I didn’t focus on it. However, once we began full runs, I realised how important it was to give myself the time to drill these in as the cast were relying on this being correct. So, I created myself a cue sheet that I could reference in the wings (figure 5b). Also, within feedback the director expressed that I needed to have intention even when moving the chairs. Though a small moment, it still holds the stage moving a chair with excitement rather than apathy.